Edinburgh Test

Pretty much every mum will know what I mean by the Edinburgh Test. It's a set of questions designed to work out if you may have post-natal depression. When I first had DS, my score was very high (indicative of PND) but I argued that I was a brand new mum, and most of the questions, about are you panicking, do you feel you're not coping are silly to ask 5 days after you've given birth!

However, I have suffered from depression before, so I know how it feels, and recently, I have been getting those same feelings again. I feel the worlds against me, DH doesn't love me (and now, that DS doesn't either) that I'm fat and ugly, that nothing's worth getting up for, very tired and lethargic, and just pretty down in the mouth. The only difference is, we have had a very traumatic few months, so perhaps I'm jumping to the wrong conclusion. First of all, DH's account was fraudulently accessed, and he lost £1000, then we found out our Landlord was selling our house, so we had to move, meaning having to find another £900 just when we're already £1000 down! It has been extremely stressful, so maybe now DH has his money back, and once the move is over, I will settle down again. I have been trying to get out a bit more, but when you're already feeling down in the dumps, it's difficult to have the presence of mind to get everything together you need for a trip out! And not having access to a car limits what you can do anyway.

Well, with any luck, we'll have a really nice weekend (my sister's coming to see us tomorrow, haven't seen her since Jan) and sunday is Mother's Day (UK) and then we're off on holiday for 5 days.

Hope things start to pick up soon... I'm exhausted!

x